'-'What's the Bayonet for?'
-'TO KILL!'
That's what the instructors had us shouting in reply,over and over again to that question.
We'd run up and down,do press ups,crawl through the mud and then,again-

-'What's the bayonet for?'
-'TO KILL!'
We'd scream,knowing that the whole point of this exercise was to get us knackered,pissed off,angry and to bring out the sort of aggression that could be handy in a bayonet fight at close quarters.
'You're not trying hard enough,back round the field!'
The sadistic instructors would merrily say.

Covered in mud and soaking combat dress,with wet heavy boots and heaving lungs,we did it AGAIN.

This time,
-'Right,what's the Bayonet for!'
-'TO KILL!'
-'Who you gonna kill!'
-'THE ENEMY!'
All these young,fit,aggressive and pissed off men would shout,ready to kill something(the training was working!).
Well,I say all the young men,but at least one of them(me)was shouting something else.
-'What's the Bayonet for?'
-'TO KILL!'
I'd yell with the others.
-'Who you gonna kill?'
-'ANYONE!'
I'd gleefully shout,trying not to show too much humour on my face(this was supposed to be dead serious).
'ANYONE!' sounded similar enough to 'THE ENEMY!',amongst 30/40 screaming voices that no-one else apparently noticed throughout the entire affair.

It kept me having fun,took the edge of the 'beasting',and actually reflected my thoughts at the time.
I really did mean 'ANYONE!'.
I've never chosen my allies or my enemies based on someone else's perspective.
If I got the chance to stick someone with 6-and-a-half inches of cold-steel,as they say,I'd do it because I joined the Army to fight,crawl in the mud and blow people up.
That's the truth.
As a teenager who had generally been a bit of a stranger in a crowd and fairly unhappy at home,
I wanted to express my feelings by eviscerating 'ANYONE!'.

I told my Mum before I left for training.
-'Mum,I'm joining the Army because I want to kill people'
-'Yes'
Not a flicker.
-'If I killed people as a civilian,they'd call me a murderer'
-'Yes'.
-'But if I kill people in the Army,they'll call me a hero'
-'Yes'
Still not a flicker.

'It's a strange world',I thought to myself.

Nowadays,I wouldn't want to kill just 'ANYONE!'.
If the need arose,I'd stick,shoot or blow up 'THE ENEMY!',should a real enemy(or threat)present.
Circumstances aside,I'd probably find it a meaningful and enriching experience,a 'manly' experience,and my 'duty'-if it was what was NEEDED.

On that cold,wet morning in that field,though-the only thing I 'killed' was an 'ENEMY!' made of Hessian sacks and stuffing,on a wooden frame.
You should have seen it,though-WHAT A FIGHT!

And I NEARLY won! ; )'


'Derek Crankshaft' 2010

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